Clarice James

Smart, Fun, Relatable Fiction


If I Died Tomorrow, What Would You Do?

princess_clarice_t_shirts-rfa733ec9911542a1abb37407cce219d6_8nhmp_324“Go to the ant, O sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise. Without having any chief, officer, or ruler,  she prepares her bread in summer and gathers her food in harvest.” ~ Pr 6:6-8 ESV

For twenty-three years I was married to a happy-go-hardworking guy who preferred that I handle our personal and business finances. Early on, we both agreed it was one of the few tasks I performed better than he did.

When the bills, mortgage, and premiums came due, I wrote the checks. I handled the checking, savings and IRA accounts along with our  business payables, receivables, and payroll. When the statements arrived, I reconciled them, being sure to enter every single ATM withdrawal he made.

Charged with maintaining a filing system, I could put my hand on anything we needed in a minute or less. When April loomed, it was me who filled out the forms and filed our tax returns.

Because my husband didn’t have to handle the day-to-day deadlines and drama, he enjoyed the freedom to work and play unhampered. Never having to stare at that bottom line—sometimes in the red—he figured if he had it in his pocket, he could spend it. He didn’t have to face the consequences because I did that for the two of us.

Even though part of me liked having control, eventually playing the role of bad cop got old.

  • “I need you to collect what’s owed so we can cover payroll.”
  • “What do you mean you bought a truck?”
  • “You told them what? They could wait to pay? But the equipment loans are due.”
  • “Yes, I know how hard you work, but that doesn’t always mean we can afford what we want.”

I can still hear the question I used to ask him time and time again: “If I died tomorrow, what would you do?”

Well, the thing is, I didn’t die. But he did.

Being a widow with an income cut by two-thirds is bleak enough without being lost in a maze of unfamiliar financial and personal records. I was thankful I knew what to do. Although it didn’t lessen my grief, in some weird way, it made grief bearable without that extra burden to carry.

Now, almost seventeen years later, I am blessed to be remarried to a wonderful man.  And guess what? Since the day we got married in 2006, this Prince Charming  has handled the finances! Without day-to-day deadlines and drama, I enjoy the freedom to work and play unhampered. Never having to stare at that bottom line, I figure if I have it in my wallet, I can spend it. I don’t have to face the consequences because he does that for the two of us.


But don’t I deserve it after all these years?

15clariceI hear the Voice of Reason. “Hello Clarice.” He asks the question I used to ask time and time again: “If he died tomorrow, what would you do?”

ME: “Oh, be quiet.”

VOR: “No, really, what would you do?”

ME: “I don’t want to talk about it.”

VOR: “You have to talk about it at one point or another.”

ME: “Why? I enjoy being treated like a princess.”

VOR: “I’d have never guessed. You do know life is not a fairytale, don’t you?”

ME: “Leave me alone. If the time comes, I’ll figure it out.”

VOR: “Oh, really? What’s your attorney’s name? Where’s the deed to your house? Do you know the user name and password to get into your online bank account?”

ME: “It’s filed with our important stuff.”

VOR: “Where is that exactly?”

ME: “It’s for me to know and for you to find out.”

VOR: “Does your husband have a Health Care Proxy? Where are your insurance policies? Do you have a key to the safety deposit box? Do you even know if you have a safety deposit box?”

ME: “Do you even know what a killjoy you are?”

VOR: “You’re being a bit childish, don’t you think?

ME: “I-know-you-are-but-what-am-I?”

VOR: “Please, tell me what you intend to do next?”

ME: “Pfftt, pfftt, pfftt!”

After pouting for a period of time deemed appropriate for royalty, I decided to ask my husband a few questions. “Do you have a Health Care Proxy? Where’s your life insurance policy? Can I have a key to the safety deposit box?”

I think I scared him.

Once I explained how loudly the Voice of Reason had spoken, he relaxed and agreed we needed to talk. And I agreed to listen.

Here’s a helpful article by Roger Whitney of WWK Wealth Advisors called Have You Shared Your ICE Plan with Anyone? He’s also provided a free worksheet to download, Your Life ICE Worksheet, to help you organize your financial life.

We’re filling ours out now. I feel better already. How about you?

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Meet & Greet Author Susan Call

But God will never forget the needy; the hope of the afflicted will never perish. ~ Psalm 9:18 (NIV)

Susan CallCLARICE: When did you know you wanted to be a writer?

SUSAN: Sitting in the audience at a large women’s conference, the transparency of one of the speakers really impacted me. I realized that the more genuine she was in sharing her difficult journey, the more the audience heard and felt God. Through her story, God was demonstrated so vividly. Soon, my own story started percolating – so much so that I could no longer be silent. I had to write! My sincere hope is that through my writing and sharing of my testimony, that people are encouraged and see how faithful God is!

CLARICE: How did you get involved in writing for publication?

SUSAN: I entered my first manuscript into a writing contest, hoping to win, but never really thinking I would. Imagine my shock when I learned I was the grand prize winner! The prize – my book, A Search for Purple Cows – A true story of hope, was published as a self-published title. Within two months of the release, I had a contract to release my book with a traditional publisher, Guidepost Books.

CLARICE: What do you want readers to experience while reading your books?

SUSAN: I want my readers to experience refreshing hope for life’s challenges. One of the biggest lies this world has to offer is that we’re the only one struggling and that everyone else has “life” all figured out. We’re not alone in our difficulties. I would love for readers to know that no matter what life has dealt them, they are not alone. God is available, present, and loves them. Life’s lions may be close but the same God that protected Daniel in the lion’s den can give each and every one of us His strength and peace.

Call CowsCLARICE: What do you want your readers to know about you?

SUSAN: I’m an imperfect person following where God leads. My high school senior writing teacher told me I was an awful writer. She said I should “never write.” I’ve heard it said that God doesn’t call the qualified but qualifies the called. I guess I’m living proof! I think the second things I’d like my readers to know is that I love hearing how they’re impacted by my writing. The notes, feedback, and reviews encourage me to keep going. And, I’m always blessed to witness God touch the heart of someone through a word He’s allowed me to deliver.

CLARICE: Tell us a little bit about your book.

SUSAN: A Search for Purple Cows – A true story of hope is my memoir. A few years after marrying my husband, I realized that the idyllic life the world saw–a beautiful home, two wonderful children and everything a family could desire was a façade hiding my difficult truth. Behind closed doors, I was tormented by my husband’s alcoholism, domestic abuse, and infidelity. Through the unlikely source of a Christian radio station, God found me in the midst of my pain and brought me hope that fostered a new faith. I eventually found the strength to flee and start anew. Written with candor and grace, A Search for Purple Cows – A true story of hope will leave you laughing, crying, and believing that God is present and able, ready to bring hope and healing.

CLARICE: What inspired you to write this particular book? 

SUSAN: My story deals with alcoholism, abuse, and infidelity, all topics that are remarkably common, yet often not talked about. I want others to know that there is hope. There is a way. And, they are not alone!

CLARICE: Has the Lord used you for his purposes through the writing and distribution of your book(s)?

SUSAN: I’ve been so blessed by watching God move through the release of my story. Both through speaking engagements and through my book, I’ve had the opportunity to speak with so many others who have shared a similar journey. From a woman in Arizona finally ready to get help to be safe, to the divorced single mom in New Jersey who had lost hope, I’ve had a front row seat watching God touch and change the lives of others with His peace and strength. My writing is a tangible modern-day example of Romans 8:28. The difficulties of a broken marriage marred by abuse and infidelity, is being used for good and bringing Him glory!

CLARICE: What are some resources you recommend to readers who want to learn more about the topics you address in your book? 

Websites: – The National Domestic Violence Hotline – A national resource available to assist with domestic violence. (1-800-799-7233) DivorceCare is a divorce recovery program offering valuable resources dealing with the issues faced by those confronted with divorce or separation.


Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life by Dr. Henry Cloud and John Townsend

I Should Forgive, But… by Dr. Chuck Lynch

CLARICE: What writing projects are you currently working on?

My newest project will be released mid October this year. I’ve written a short story “Secondhand Miracle” in A Cup of Christmas Cheer. Additionally as part of the book launch, I have an article in the October Guideposts magazine. In addition, I am currently working on my next book project. I’ve had the opportunity to pitch the abstract to a few publishers who are now waiting for my full proposal. Stay tuned for more information on that project. Readers can also find my blog online at

Surely they intend to topple me from my lofty place; they take delight in lies. With their mouths they bless, but in their hearts they curse. Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. ~ Psalm 62:4-6 (NIV)


MnGSusan Heim Call is one of seven published authors who’ll be featured at the MEET & GREET LOCAL CHRISTIAN AUTHORS event scheduled for Saturday, November 1, 2014 from 3:00 to 5:30 pm at Bonhoeffer’s Café & Espresso, 8 Franklin St., Nashua, New Hampshire. Guests will enjoy FREE admission, refreshments, book-signings, special discounts, and door prizes–including a chance to win a Kindle Paperwhite! Click HERE to register!  For more information, call Clarice James at 603-578-1860 or Cindy Saab at (978) 821-6547.


Words That Strike Fear in My Husband’s Heart

2014-10-20 -300-150When I utter this specific string of five words, I see fear in my husband’s eyes, I hear it in his voice, and, I swear, I smell it oozing from his pores. The words in themselves are innocuous; it’s what they represent that scares him.

Some husbands panic at “We have car insurance, right?” Others tremble at “Mother’s coming for a visit!” And a few quake at “Honey, I think I’m pregnant.”

Not my husband. First, he doesn’t let me drive that often. Second, my mom won’t leave home for more than three hours at a time. And, third, we’ve decided to wait to have kids.

[That’s a joke for those who are looking at my profile photo and wondering if I’m delusional.]

“What could those words possibly be?” you ask. The five little words that strike fear in my husband’s heart are . . .

“Hey, I have an idea!”

Persuasive-Essay-IdeasHe tries to hide the terror, but his subtle body language tells me otherwise: the slumping shoulders, the eye-twitching, the convulsing, the hand slapping his forehead, or his head banging against the wall. He thinks I don’t notice, but I’m observant, if nothing else.

I don’t know what his problem is. My “hey-I-have-an-idea” ideas have been good ones, if I do say so myself.

  • Begin an online publishing syndicate. [I admit working twelve hours a day and watching $13,000 go down the cyber drain was not the most fun we’ve had.]
  • Create an art piece to draw attention to our living room’s cathedral ceiling. [Can you believe he took issue with lifting and hanging my 4-foot by 8-foot masterpiece built of wood, tile, and stone?]
  • Start Party of One, A Fellowship for Those Tired of Dining Alone. [Some found it unusual that I asked my husband of four years if I could start a group for singles. Who knew?]
  • Initiate a marketing campaign for my fellow literary clients—all 154 of them. [Sheesh. All I asked him to do was take pictures of the books individually on our bookshelf; size the photos; create individual Facebook cover photo banners; Photoshop e-books into the bookshelf; and, oh, create the nonexistent book spines for these e-books.]
  • I convinced him to join the critique group which meets at our house, you know, just to help out. Now he has an anthology of short stories published called, Premium Mixed Nuts.)

Hmm . . . Hey, I have an idea!

Since my husband is so good at executing my ideas, I think I’ll make him a nice meal today before he gets any of his own ideas about that singles group.


Actual size of wall hanging: 4′ x 8′